These lasers are WICKED, and I must have one

Wicked Lasers Krypton

Make sure to check out this beauty in all its Kryptonian glory

It’s not often I find a toy that I have dreams about owning. If you haven’t had this kind of dream before let me lay one on you real quick.

I’m in the jungle, running as fast as I can. I’m not sure what’s chasing me but it is HUGE. Looks like something between a Dragon and Cheddar cheese. Certain death is upon me, I’m sweating, running out of breath and the thing is gaining on me. Only one thing to do – JEDI MIND TRICK!!!! I stick my hand out and The Force delivers to me the most powerful laser ever put into the hands of consumers. I turn around point that sucker right at CheeseDragon’s face and blind him. Then I attach the light saber attachment (only $99.99) and slide him up into cracker sized chunks. Sticking mostly to the white meat for all you health conscious readers. O.k. I am weird, but set that aside for a second and imagine how much fun you could have with this crazy thing. Plus, if you’re into hiking, sailing or other sports where one could get lost for days at a time you’ll never have to worry about signal fires.
Under review by Guinness World Records, the Spyder 3 Krypton is the world’s brightest handheld laser. This thing actually goes into outer space it is so bright, the range is over 85 MILES! Put it this way, should you look into the dot of the Krypton you’ll be treated to light that’s just north of 8,000 times brighter than the sun! DUDE.

Let’s throw in a little disclaimer here shall we, don’t be an idiot and do something dumb with this if you buy it. Please, and if you do, don’t blame me.

How much? For the version I’m looking at, with the light sabre attachment it’s $1,149.

Why? Because if nothing else, you can always attach it to shark (for sharks with frickin laser beams)

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